Last week, I sat on the phone for fifteen long minutes, listening to someone close to me yell and curse. Part of it was directed at me and part of it was not. Sitting in the beautiful red leather armchair in the Ballroom, I let the flow of her words and intensity come over me, one violent wave at a time.
I knew what was happening.
I knew that the cap on a tightly sealed pressure cooker had finally popped. I knew that it was years overdue, maybe decades. I knew it had been a hard, shocking day. I knew a good thing was taking place. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I even sensed that it was an honor to be on the receiving end of this catharsis. To be the one chosen to witness it.
I listened. I stayed focused. I asked my mind not to engage and I asked my heart to stay open. I used a whole bunch of the tools I share in my work.
And it worked.
After fifteen minutes, I was able to end the call without having snapped back and without having taken any of it personally. I had been able to be a container for whatever she needed to purge. In many ways, it had been perfect.
Which is why I was so surprised by the toll this took on me.
I walked out of the Ballroom in a daze. I dove into a plate of Pad Thai as though the curly noodles could heal whatever blue-gray sticky stuff was starting to make itself at home inside of me. My mind was making all kinds of noise about “how good this had been.”
I was exhausted.
When we talked the next day, she was back to her calm self and expressed her surprise at the intensity of the moment. The conversation was easy and once again, I was glad to have been there for whatever needed to happen.
And I could still feel the cost. Awesome tools and all.
So here’s to having the tools, to using the tools, and to giving ourselves plenty of grace for the tenderness of our humanness.
Here’s to knowing that feeling things does not mean that we are not “enlightened” or where we should be.
And here’s to a nice steamy plate of Pad Thai noodles.
Share on Facebook
Do you want to lead YOUR OWN
I can teach you!
Click here for info
"Every time I read your blog I am so profoundly happy I did. The truth you speak is just mindboggling. The real, real voice you have. It makes me almost crazy how much I love your words and your way of telling stories that cut to the quick- and I never have the words to really say how much this all means to me.
You put out so many heartfelt blog pieces that touch my heart and move me down the right path at the right time. Pure beautiful magic girlie. I love you for this.
Thank you for digging in there and finding the gems of wisdom and then just sharing them out as if there's an endless supply ... which with you, there is."
Schedule a Happiness Coaching Session
ESSENTIAL HAPPINESS RETREAT IN BALI!
Meet me in Bali and experience Joyful Transformation!
April 15 to 25, 2020
"Thank you for sharing your wonderful, heartbreaking, exhilarating experience with the world."
"Thank You Laura for sharing, for teaching and spreading loving kindness. "
"I think I love you. You bring good things into my life, or remind me of things I love and know, but have let go of."
"Laura, you are so good for me. I laugh and sniffle and get the shivers when I read your essays. Thanks so much for letting all your wonderfulness run around loose."
"Heart-achingly beautiful, your words and how you reveal your truth."
"Thank you so much for who you are and what you share with the world. Your mere being transforms lives as it has transformed mine. This particular post did to my heart what water does to parched soil."
"Thank you for your gentle words that are packed full of wisdom. I have been struggling with the concept of what words can do to another person when they are negative words. Your words are the flip side of our word power, and shows how delightfully powerful kind words can be. Thank you."
"Once again Laura Lavigne takes you on an adventure of the heart. She has a way of pulling you right in the car with her. Asking you to consider changing a fear to taking thoughtful action. Whether she's teaching a class, leading a retreat or heading for a happiness sprinkling, Laura will invite you to shed old ways of thinking and be completely authentic. Join in!"
"Essentially pure love.
I enjoy how Laura is kind to herself and to us other humans who dance in and out of each other's lives. "
"Don't miss a post!
You can count on Laura for warmth, humor, charm, and a lift to your day and your heart. She inspires me to be braver than I am, and to love the world out loud. She's a gem, and a generous one at that!"
I write because this is the way I am able to taste life more deeply.