A friend of mine was having a tough time. Her life had hit one of these bumps that tend to show up once in a while. Because she and I are not very close friends, I did not know what the best way to bring a little relief to her life would be.
I considered asking her to "let me know if she needed anything," but somehow, I sensed that while it would make me feel better to have offered, not much of anything useful would come out of it, for her.
Then I considered offering something specific. Maybe bringing her some soup or some chocolate (this usually works for me). And yet, it still did not feel quite right.
Guided by a burst of inspiration, I chose to take on a more direct tactic and asked her to "tell me three things she needed, right now."
Three things. Three things she needed. Right now.
Immediately, she answered:
Within an hour, I showed up at her door with a hot meal for that night and her medication. Later that evening, I set up a "Meal Train," that would allow other people to join in the privilege of making her life a little easier AND would provide her with some nutritious, effortless food for a while - not to mention remind her of how much she is loved.
I am so glad this very specific question came to my mind. I have a feeling that this is one I will use again and again.
"Tell Me Three Things You Need, Right Now."
I invite your to try it.
"Every time I read your blog I am so profoundly happy I did. The truth you speak is just mindboggling. The real, real voice you have. It makes me almost crazy how much I love your words and your way of telling stories that cut to the quick- and I never have the words to really say how much this all means to me.
You put out so many heartfelt blog pieces that touch my heart and move me down the right path at the right time. Pure beautiful magic girlie. I love you for this.
Thank you for digging in there and finding the gems of wisdom and then just sharing them out as if there's an endless supply ... which with you, there is."
"Thank you for sharing your wonderful, heartbreaking, exhilarating experience with the world."
"Thank You Laura for sharing, for teaching and spreading loving kindness. "
"I think I love you. You bring good things into my life, or remind me of things I love and know, but have let go of."
"Laura, you are so good for me. I laugh and sniffle and get the shivers when I read your essays. Thanks so much for letting all your wonderfulness run around loose."
"Heart-achingly beautiful, your words and how you reveal your truth."
"Thank you so much for who you are and what you share with the world. Your mere being transforms lives as it has transformed mine. This particular post did to my heart what water does to parched soil."
"Thank you for your gentle words that are packed full of wisdom. I have been struggling with the concept of what words can do to another person when they are negative words. Your words are the flip side of our word power, and shows how delightfully powerful kind words can be. Thank you."
"Once again Laura Lavigne takes you on an adventure of the heart. She has a way of pulling you right in the car with her. Asking you to consider changing a fear to taking thoughtful action. Whether she's teaching a class, leading a retreat or heading for a happiness sprinkling, Laura will invite you to shed old ways of thinking and be completely authentic. Join in!"
"Essentially pure love.
I enjoy how Laura is kind to herself and to us other humans who dance in and out of each other's lives. "
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You can count on Laura for warmth, humor, charm, and a lift to your day and your heart. She inspires me to be braver than I am, and to love the world out loud. She's a gem, and a generous one at that!"
I write because this is the way I am able to taste life more deeply.