The "Things-Can-Get-Really-Bad" voice is a big fat bully.
It likes to threaten us vaguely, not using real words.
It likes to talk to us, from the vantage point of being perched on our shoulder, where we can't really see it, never offering to look at us in the eye.
It likes to bring up old fears, and is really savvy at knowing what makes us weak.
Often, all it takes to send it away, is one good clear question. A question that will cut through the vague threats, the terrible, terrible stories.
This questions is:
What it the worse that can happen?
Once we have asked that question, it's good to listen for the answer (and it may be a little minute before a concrete answer shows up. Wait for the concrete). Then, maybe ask again. And maybe one more time.
Ask until you have a crystal clear / can taste it picture of what this worse scenario looks like. Then sit with it. Look at it. Settle into it. Get as cozy as you can with it.
How bad is it? One a scale of 1 to 10, what is it?
Chances are, it's not a 10. Maybe a 9, but most likely not a 10.
Certainly not the 12 "Things-Can-Get-Really-Bad" big fat bully voice wanted us to believe.
You see, clarity killed the bully. It took a whole lot of courage, but it did it.
Go ahead, ask.
"Thank you for sharing your wonderful, heartbreaking, exhilarating experience with the world."
"Thank You Laura for sharing, for teaching and spreading loving kindness. "
"I think I love you. You bring good things into my life, or remind me of things I love and know, but have let go of."
"Laura, you are so good for me. I laugh and sniffle and get the shivers when I read your essays. Thanks so much for letting all your wonderfulness run around loose."
"Heart-achingly beautiful, your words and how you reveal your truth."
"Thank you so much for who you are and what you share with the world. Your mere being transforms lives as it has transformed mine. This particular post did to my heart what water does to parched soil."
"Thank you for your gentle words that are packed full of wisdom. I have been struggling with the concept of what words can do to another person when they are negative words. Your words are the flip side of our word power, and shows how delightfully powerful kind words can be. Thank you."
"Once again Laura Lavigne takes you on an adventure of the heart. She has a way of pulling you right in the car with her. Asking you to consider changing a fear to taking thoughtful action. Whether she's teaching a class, leading a retreat or heading for a happiness sprinkling, Laura will invite you to shed old ways of thinking and be completely authentic. Join in!"
"Essentially pure love.
I enjoy how Laura is kind to herself and to us other humans who dance in and out of each other's lives. "
"Don't miss an post!
You can count on Laura for warmth, humor, charm, and a lift to your day and your heart. She inspires me to be braver than I am, and to love the world out loud. She's a gem, and a generous one at that!"
I write because this is the way I am able to taste life more deeply.