Laura Lavigne
  • Home
  • THE HAPPINESS SPRINKLING PROJECT
  • ART
  • Blog
  • COACHING
    • COACHING PACKAGES
  • HappyU
  • MORE
    • Happiness Retreats
    • THE CENTER FOR HAPPINESS
    • HAPPYU FREE COMMuNITY
    • HAPPINESS SPRINKLING CARDS
    • BOOKS BY LAURA
    • Laura's YouTube Channel
    • Essence Facilitators
I write because that's how
I get to taste life all the way.

GET my blog

Heart Healing Suds

2/27/2021

0 Comments

 
Picture
I had not done the dishes in a week.

Day after day, as my sister and I walked, talked and played from her house to mine, I looked at the growing pile and thought: not today.

I don’t think I have ever let a dish sit in a sink more than a day in my whole adult life.

When I got back alone to the village yesterday, it felt a little more foreign, my house a little more empty.

I questioned my choice to live so far away from hearts I love, from the very few people whose blood I share.

My mind was telling me painful stories as my body lead me gently to the sink.

I heated up a big pot of water. Added a strong squirt of bright green soap and swished it around with my hand until it magically turned into suds.

Then one by one I washed each cup, spoon, plate and knife.

The thoughts got quiet as the dishes got clean.

Birds overhead, late afternoon sun, baby bougainvilleas.

Hot water, then cool water.

Allowing the simplicity to smooth the pointy edges.

Wiping down the sink, then my hands.

More quiet in my head, less hurt in my heart.

More remembering, too.

Remembering how good it is for us to have our kitchen sinks be where we feel peaceful and alive.

And how lucky we are to share these places with those we love.
0 Comments

A Distinction That Made My Mind Go Boom!

2/23/2021

2 Comments

 
Picture
I once attached my heart to a man after seeing him cry as he told me about the day his dog was euthanized, a decade before.

What I saw as his tender heart spoke straight to mine, and what I understood as his depth of feelings won me over.

Years later, the same man berated me for wanting to postpone our Sunday breakfast by an hour so that I may go support a friend as she took her own dog for a last, heartbreaking visit to the vet.

This man often teared up when hearing about acts of kindness - yet was reliably sharply unpleasant to waiters and waitresses.

I have a dozen examples of what I considered crazy-making inconsistencies of this flavor, over the years. Some of them unsettling.

They puzzled me and I often wondered what I was missing, what I was not understanding. Really: what was wrong with me?

How could someone who felt so much ... feel so little?

Over time, too many forays on that not-so-sensitive side took their toll and I eventually took my own heart back. Something I do neither well nor fast.

But still, I did not understand.

Until just a couple of months ago, in my kitchen. While making breakfast.

We were discussing a movie we had watched the night before and I was grappling with trying to figure out what had been clearly missing for me, from a movie that seemed to have touched so many people.

Thats when my son, while making fresh orange juice said: “well, it’s important to not confuse depth and sentimentality.”

Depth and sentimentality.

Bam! That was it.

Not only did it explain what was missing for me in the movie, but it shone a big bright flashlight on that other nagging question.

In the early days of that long ago relationship, I had confused the two. I had confused depth and sentimentality.

I had seen the sentimentality, had kissed the tears, and had decided that surely, they were merely the tip of a big, miles-deep glorious iceberg of depth and empathy.

“it’s important to not confuse depth and sentimentality.”

Indeed.

I love this. I love distinctions that make us stop and think. And then stop and think about our own actions, our own ways of being in the world.

Ever since that conversation, I’ve been checking in with myself when my heart does a little stirring.

“Is this depth or sentimentality?”

Not judging, not making one good and the other one bad.

Just simply, importantly, not confusing the two.

And definitely not making big decisions based on that confusion.

Here’s to Clarity, to learning, to growing - and to being darn nice to waitresses.
2 Comments

I Did My Sister a Favor

2/20/2021

0 Comments

 
Picture
My sister arrives tomorrow, for a week.

We have planned this time together since before I left and because my place is so small, she has booked a sweet little two-bedroom casita, only a block away from me.

Her place looked super cute, with two bedrooms and a swimming pool. Also, it is a "real house," compared with my well... charming tiny shack.

We have been looking forward to being neighbors, exploring the village together, me getting to play tourist with her, and indulging in restaurants and cafes.

A couple of days ago, in response to hearing me express some tiredness over the perennial dustiness of my place, combined with a yearning for a "normal" shower she asked me if I would do her a favor. I think she sensed that after six-weeks, I was ready for a change.

"Here's what I'd like" - she started. "I would really like it if I could start my official stay at the Airbnb a few days earlier and you could go in and add some personal touches, maybe some fruits or something. Making it feel, homey, you know? So that when I got there on Sunday, it would already feel lived-in and cozy for me." To which she added: "And if you wanted to take a shower and a dip in the pool and maybe sleep there a couple of nights, that would be nice too."

So smooth, isn't she?

So because how could I turn down doing her such a big favor, yesterday found me walking several times from my place to hers and back, carrying baskets of food, my laptop, and my yoga mat, Lila wondering what the heck we were up to, now.

There was definitely a touch of Mexican Beverly Hillbillies in the air.

The pool is divine. The shower is tiled, with great water pressure and a seemingly unlimited number of temperature options, at a fingertip. The towels soft and huge. What really got me was when I turned on the kitchen sink to wash the dishes: I immediately had hot water rushing out of the faucet.

Wow.

So here we are, couches, oven and all.

So glad I could do her this solid favor.

I just hope I don't get too soft.




0 Comments
<<Previous
    Receive my posts in your email

    SCARED OF THE SACRED

    Picture
    Picture

    HAPPINESS SCHOOL:
    90 days to up-level your life in a FOREVER way.



    My new book:

    Picture


    My Elephant Journal Articles:


    Scared of the Sacred - Texas, Afghanistan and Sea Turtles

    What Happens When We Half A** Our Apologies

    I wasn't Expecting to Lose my Emotional Virginity on Lesvos

    Becoming One With My Backpack, at 53

    Some Days We Have to Mow the Lawn Twice


    The Lesson I Learned from a Moroccan Street Market

    Dear Man Who Says He Wants Intimacy

    How to Not Abandon Ourselves When the Going Gets Rough

    Just Sitting There Doing Nothing: What I Learned From an Italian Balcony
    Picture
    "Every time I read your blog I am so profoundly happy I did.  The truth you speak is just mindboggling.  The real, real voice you have.  It makes me almost crazy how much I love your words and your way of telling stories that cut to the quick- and I never have the words to really say how much this all means to me. 

    You put out so many heartfelt blog pieces that touch my heart and move me down the right path at the right time.  Pure beautiful magic girlie. I love you for this.

    Thank you for digging in there and finding the gems of wisdom and then just sharing them out as if there's an endless supply ... which with you, there is."


    "Thank you for sharing your wonderful, heartbreaking, exhilarating experience with the world."

    "Thank You Laura for sharing, for teaching and spreading loving kindness. "

    "I think I love you. You bring good things into my life, or remind me of things I love and know, but have let go of."

    "Laura, you are so good for me. I laugh and sniffle and get the shivers when I read your essays. Thanks so much for letting all your wonderfulness run around loose."

    "Heart-achingly beautiful, your words and how you reveal your truth."

    "Thank you so much for who you are and what you share with the world. Your mere being transforms lives as it has transformed mine. This particular post did to my heart what water does to parched soil."

    "Thank you for your gentle words that are packed full of wisdom. I have been struggling with the concept of what words can do to another person when they are negative words. Your words are the flip side of our word power, and shows how delightfully powerful kind words can be. Thank you."

    "Once again Laura Lavigne takes you on an adventure of the heart. She has a way of pulling you right in the car with her. Asking you to consider changing a fear to taking thoughtful action. Whether she's teaching a class, leading a retreat or heading for a happiness sprinkling, Laura will invite you to shed old ways of thinking and be completely authentic. Join in!"

    "Essentially pure love.
    I enjoy how Laura is kind to herself and to us other humans who dance in and out of each other's lives. "


    "Don't miss a post!
    You can count on Laura for warmth, humor, charm, and a lift to your day and your heart. She inspires me to be braver than I am, and to love the world out loud. She's a gem, and a generous one at that!"

    Me

    I write because this is the way I am able to  taste life more deeply.

    Archives

    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016

Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
  • Home
  • THE HAPPINESS SPRINKLING PROJECT
  • ART
  • Blog
  • COACHING
    • COACHING PACKAGES
  • HappyU
  • MORE
    • Happiness Retreats
    • THE CENTER FOR HAPPINESS
    • HAPPYU FREE COMMuNITY
    • HAPPINESS SPRINKLING CARDS
    • BOOKS BY LAURA
    • Laura's YouTube Channel
    • Essence Facilitators