Yesterday morning, for the first time since I made "The Decision," I started to feel the tug. On my way to meeting a close friend for our bi-weekly morning walk, it occurred to me that these precious hours were now counted. She and I have walked in the mornings, off and on for several years, and these moments are both important and delicious. Together, we debrief, we gain perspective, we laugh, we vent - and we set the day to come. And per our calculations, we have about 5 of these bits of goodness to enjoy. For now.
It's good. I am choosing this. Because life is so skilled at giving us what we want (I have a retroactive blog post coming about that and the magic that took place in the last weeks or two to make this happen) I am grateful for what's to come. And there are only 5 of these special walks left.
All of a sudden, the switch has been flipped, and while I intend to remain as present as possible in the deliciousness of my life here, I know that time has come to prepare for the next chapter, time has come for many "last times - for now."
Which means thinking about the very few things I want to take with me.
And that part is a lot of fun.
Why? Because, just as a move to a smaller home asks of us to pay really close attention to what is Actively Used or Deeply Cherished, the thought of living out of a backpack (which we have to carry) for 6 months has a way of getting us thinking essentially really quickly.
So yesterday, I got busy doing just that. Thinking about what I will want to not be without. And conveniently enough, the answer to this question surprises me by landing me to pretty much one place: my herbalist. In the lovely shop, aided by a young woman whom I have learned to trust, I am loading up on my special tea, and my favorite oil. Out of the shop with a small brown shopping bag, I feel ready. Most anything else, I can do without or I can get "there," wherever there happens to be, But even sweeter than being ready, I love having gotten that closer look at me, and at what matters to me.
Organic tea and organic oil.
I don't know that I knew this about me.
Sounds like the gifts have already started.
"Every time I read your blog I am so profoundly happy I did. The truth you speak is just mindboggling. The real, real voice you have. It makes me almost crazy how much I love your words and your way of telling stories that cut to the quick- and I never have the words to really say how much this all means to me.
Thank you for digging in there and finding the gems of wisdom and then just sharing them out as if there's an endless supply ... which with you, there is."
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I write because this is the way I am able to taste life more deeply.